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Off-Ramp—or Dead End?
Cheryl Jamis leaned back in her Italian leather chair and gazed out her corner office window, watching glints from the setting sun strike the Mersey River. In just a few moments, she would meet with Marcus Addison, her boss, and she did not know what to do. Should she resign? Should she force the company’s hand by issuing some grand ultimatum? Or should she leave it all be for now and assume some opportunity might arise down the road that would let her spend more time with her daughter, Emma? After all, she still loved her job.
At least she would finally get some clarity about the promotion Marcus had mentioned several times. Then she would know what her options were.
Her stomach knotted as she thought about this past weekend, when she had narrowly averted another child care crisis. Frauke, Emma’s beloved German au pair, was called to Hamburg suddenly because of an illness in the family. Fortunately, Cheryl hadn’t had any urgent work commitments over that weekend, and since her husband, John, was traveling, she and Emma had spent an enjoyable couple of “girls’ days” together.
“Mummy, I wish you didn’t work,” Emma had sighed. “We could be together all the time.”
Cheryl had stroked Emma’s soft hair tenderly. “I need to work, darling. Someday you’ll understand.”
The experience had made Cheryl realize how much she missed her little girl. When Monday morning came, she vaguely resented leaving Emma in the company of her grumbling Gran, who had come up from London to take care of her until Frauke returned.
Cheryl sighed and swiveled the chair back and forth with her feet. Ah well, she thought, everything would get back on track soon. Or not. A pity that the child care panic hadn’t brought her any closer to a decision about her future.
She started to think back to how she had come to this pass after spending the better part of a decade at a company she was so passionate about.
The Juggler
Cheryl was the top account manager in a boutique advertising agency when Copro courted and won her. A respected casual-wear retailer and the sole marketer of the sought-after Smitty jeans brand, Copro hired Cheryl to run an in-house marketing team and help launch a new clothing line to appeal to younger, hipper customers. For her part, Cheryl was glad to get away from the dizziness of agency work, and she welcomed the status that came with heading up a group of talented designers, writers, and media specialists.
The marriage was a happy one. Cheryl’s ambition, ideas, energy, and enthusiasm were just what the marketing department needed. After one of her television spots—featuring a sexy young woman riding bareback in her new Smitty jeans—won a coveted Olie award, a beaming Marcus had presented her with a bottle of champagne from Derek Lee, the CEO. “Keep up the great work, Cheryl!” the note had said. Cheryl kept the flattering message to herself but made sure she shared the credit—and the champagne—with her team.
Cheryl had been promoted to marketing director while pregnant with Emma. At the time, Marcus had told her that the company was counting on her to come back to work, so Cheryl made sure she never missed a beat. She returned full-time when her daughter was just three months old, leaving Emma in the care of her first nanny—the one who later left Emma sitting in the grocery cart while she packed the bags into the boot of the car, then almost drove off without her.
Cheryl enjoyed her new responsibilities at Copro, and her already solid reputation grew even stronger. But it had been horrible at times to cope with having a young child when both she and John worked. A year and a half ago, when John was on a long business trip, Emma picked up a cold at school that developed into virulent bronchitis—and Frauke got sick, too. For ten days, Cheryl fed them both chicken soup, cleaned the vaporizer, and tried to work despite their coughing fits. She wasn’t terribly successful.
Six months later, she asked Marcus if she could reduce her hours.
“I’m sure you think it is rather late to bring this up. Emma is already seven,” Cheryl told Marcus.
Marcus nodded, his eyes gleaming sympathetically. “I don’t how you manage. I couldn’t work so hard without my wife’s support.”
Cheryl smiled ruefully. True, John hadn’t been much help at home, but Frauke was a champ, and Emma got on magnificently with her. “It’s not that I can’t manage, Marcus. And maybe I should have gone part-time when she was smaller, but I wasn’t interested then. Now that she’s getting a little older, she seems to need my help more,” Cheryl said.
Marcus tugged off his glasses and wiped them with the end of his tie, a nervous gesture that did not bode well for Cheryl’s cause. “Cheryl, I’m not going to tell you no,” he said. “You can make up your own mind, of course. But I’m advising you against it, not just as your boss but as a friend.”
Marcus patted her hand earnestly. “You’ll just end up working the same hours for less pay, you know. Your job is a big, responsible one. It just can’t be done in four days, let alone three.”
“Some of the team might benefit from additional challenges,” Cheryl started, but Marcus leaned forward and cut her off.
“Cheryl, you’ve built a great team over the past few years. Now you’re ready to focus on more strategic issues, which will be key for your next step up the ladder.”
Cheryl blinked in surprise. She hadn’t considered a promotion. It was flattering, of course, but it wasn’t on her agenda right now—or was it? “No,” she told herself firmly. She’d consider it only when Emma went off to university. But since Marcus was talking about a promotion, she might try another approach and ask for flextime.
“In the past, the company has been…” she paused, searching for the right word, “reluctant to consider more flexibility in my current hours. Marcus, I wonder if that’s something we might revisit.”
Marcus raised his eyebrows and tipped back his chair. Cheryl thought some of the tension in the air seeped away. “What do you have in mind?” he asked.
Marcus’s glasses reflected the sunlight off the river, and Cheryl couldn’t see his eyes. She wondered how far to push. “Emma gets home from school by 3:00 on most days. I could come in earlier and leave earlier on a few of them.” She made it a statement, not a question.
Marcus pursed his lips and tapped his fingers on the desktop. “You spend quite a bit of time guiding your team. Do you think a schedule like that is manageable?”
Cheryl mulled the question over. “Tuesdays should be OK. That’s the afternoon everyone else on the team meets with their counterparts in sales and production.” She paused. She had no regularly scheduled appointments on Wednesday afternoon either, but if Derek or Marcus decided to stop in, that was usually the time they picked. She sighed. Perhaps it was best to drop that one. She lowered her eyes from the view over Marcus’s shoulder to catch his gaze. “Wednesdays are probably out, but I think I could arrange Thursdays. I’ve been holding group meetings then, but I could change them to Wednesday mornings; it’d be more midweek and might even give us an opportunity to take stock as well as to move forward.”
“That’s probably doable,” Marcus said, a smile growing. “I can see I’m going to have to plan for some Tuesday and Thursday breakfast meetings.”
He gave her a light clap on the shoulder. Cheryl stood, nodded, and left the room. The plan wasn’t everything she wanted, but it was a start.
No Time for Tears
It took only a few months to realize that the small shift in hours wasn’t enough.
Emma rang Cheryl on her mobile minutes before a key executive meeting where she was due to give an important marketing presentation. At the sound of Emma’s teary voice, Cheryl shoved down her own anxiety and tried to keep her voice steady.
“What is it, honey? What’s the matter?”
“Mum, you promised you’d come.”
“Come?” Cheryl echoed, wracking her brains to remember what she must have forgotten.
“My play, at lunchtime. You told me you would be there.”
Cheryl’s stomach roiled. She cursed silently.
She scanned the conference room, which was rapidly filling. The executives were milling about, and there were only a few minutes left before the meeting started. There was absolutely no way she could leave now. “Honey, I’m so sorry. I forgot. I feel terrible, but I don’t think I can make it there now.”
“Never mind, Mum. You already missed it.” Emma rang off.
“I’ll make it up to you,” Cheryl whispered into the dead phone. If she had a bit more courage, she would just stop negotiating with Copro and take a stand. She thought about her old friend Nancy, who had quit the ad agency and was working solo. Why not do the same?
She decided she could steal a moment to recover unobserved. In the washroom, she dragged in a deep breath and stared at her reflection. She didn’t look like she’d just stepped into her own Bad Mother nightmare. Was it even possible to be a topflight executive and a good mother?
Cheryl sighed. It wouldn’t help to berate herself further. She caught a few strands of wayward hair and fastened them back with a hairpin. Maybe she was overreacting. She had a free weekend coming up. She could take Emma to Alton Towers Theme Park for a couple of days. Yes, that was just the thing. She’d call and book a hotel room after the presentation. And perhaps HR would have some ideas about what she could do longer term.
Feeling somewhat better, Cheryl returned to the conference room. The assembled executives were seated. It was her turn to speak. She forced herself to concentrate and strode to the lectern.
The presentation passed in a blur. Applause followed her closing summary, and she looked up, relieved. She unplugged her computer, tucked away the laser pointer, and packed up the rest of her belongings. She sucked in her breath when she saw Derek approaching.“Good stuff, Cheryl,” he said, smiling broadly. She thanked him with a grin and thought, “Just call me Superwoman.”
Back in her office, Cheryl booked the hotel for the Alton Towers weekend, which helped her stop chastising herself. She basked in Derek’s praise for a few moments before getting back to work.
The next day, Marcus called her in. Cheryl felt good, still buoyed up by Derek’s comments and relieved that Emma was happy, too. She had babbled away over dinner about the ferocious Congo River Rapids ride at Alton Towers. And Cheryl was optimistic that HR would have some thoughts for her. She’d get right down there after speaking to Marcus.
“Well done, Cheryl,” Marcus said, a big smile on his tanned face. “It was an excellent presentation and a good campaign proposal. It’s fresh and original. I’m confident it’ll be taken up when the board meets tomorrow.”
“Thanks, Marcus,” she said. “I was pleased with its reception.”
“Derek was really impressed. It’s your ticket into the upper echelons.”
Cheryl sat up straighter; it was the second time Marcus had mentioned a promotion in recent months. She grinned at him. “Do you have something particular up your sleeve?”
He waved a hand. “Nothing concrete, but there are some possibilities that might be in the frame.”
Cheryl found herself sorting through the various VP functions that might be within her reach. Such a position would be a real coup. She’d be one of a handful of women at that level. Despite Marcus’s airy dismissal, she knew him well enough to believe there was something in the works.
With a bit of surprise, Cheryl realized the prospect genuinely excited her. She shook her head ruefully. If she couldn’t sort out her own values and objectives, she’d never make up her mind about what to do.
It was as if Marcus were reading her thoughts. “It’s a good thing you decided against the part-time option a couple months ago.”
Cheryl stiffened. “It is? Why do you say that?”
He must have caught the flicker in her eye. “You know how things are, Cheryl. The company has been flexible with your working hours. But look around. There aren’t many part-timers at the top of this company or any other. If a promotion is important to you, then that isn’t the road.” Marcus kicked back. “As it is, you’re very well positioned.”
Cheryl remembered Emma’s sobs over the phone yesterday and wondered how well positioned she could possibly be. HR, she repeated to herself, would have some advice.
Suddenly, Marcus whacked both hands on his desk and stood. “Listen, I’ve got a great idea. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it sooner—it’s just the thing to give you some exposure and a chance to develop. I was going to go myself, but, now that I think about it, it would be perfect for you.”
Smiling at the boyish grin on Marcus’s face, Cheryl asked, “Whatever are you talking about?”
“Why, it’s that trip to Boulder I was telling you about the other day. We need to develop our business in the United States. Copro is setting up a task force there next weekend. You can go and take my place.”
Cheryl’s heart thudded painfully in her chest. Next weekend was her date with Emma at Alton Towers.
“Is it a must?”
“Do you have another commitment?”
“Well, I did have some plans,” Cheryl said. She cleared her throat to buy time. “I suppose I could rearrange things.”
“The exposure would be fantastic for you.” Marcus fastened his gaze on hers. “It’s a great opportunity—if you think you can manage it, of course. If not, I can still go.”
Cheryl forced a smile to her face. Why could she never say no? The word was just two letters long; it couldn’t be that hard to push past her lips. “Well, if you think I’d get a lot out of it, I’ll do it.”
Marcus smiled. “Great! That’s just great. You won’t regret it.”
Cheryl wasn’t so sure. She thought she might be regretting it already. She had no idea what she would say to Emma, and she would have to reschedule the Alton Towers weekend. At least her capital with the company was on a steep upward climb. The higher her position, the more flexibility she might be able to give herself.
A Middle Ground?
“Cheryl, from my perspective, a manager at your level needs high visibility,” Deb Roth, the director of HR, said. She shook her head. “That means being in the office, not working part-time or from home. Especially if you want a promotion, which you tell me might be in the offing.”
“Deb, I don’t want a promotion to the exclusion of all else. I’m trying to find a way to bring greater balance to my life and spend some more time with my daughter. And now I’ve accepted a trip to Boulder that wasn’t essential and conflicts with plans I’d made with her.”
“You know, it occurs to me that we do have several women who are doing some unusual job shares,” Deb offered. “I don’t think they are on the same level as you, but I could look into it—or, alternatively, I could talk to senior management on your behalf. Maybe there is some middle ground that none of us have considered yet.”
“Speaking to senior management might put my promotion at risk.”
“Not necessarily. The senior team is committed to meeting the staff’s needs, where possible. They’ll listen, though of course I can’t promise anything.” Deb tapped her pen on the table between them. “It would help if you could get a better handle on what you want. I used an executive coach when I was debating whether to leave the company some years ago.”
Cheryl shot her a look. “You considered leaving, too, did you?”
Deb nodded. “Of course. It’s tough, I know. I have three kids of my own, but they’re older now.” She sighed. “It’s more common than you think; I hear a lot of stories. I can give you a coach’s name if you’d like.”
Cheryl took the number, but she didn’t dial it.
The Moment of Truth
Cheryl looked at the Mersey outside her office window and realized the sun had set. The sky was streaked with pinks and oranges. She shoved herself out of her chair and strode to Marcus’s office. It was time to find out what high-powered job she was in line for. Then she could pin down her options—and make a choice.
When Marcus opened the door, he was frowning. “I’m glad you’re here. We need to talk.”
Cheryl raised her brows at him as he waved her to a chair.
“It seems there’s a board-level discussion about some of our positions, a strategy debate if you will.” He cleared his throat. “In any case, that promotion we expected to come through for you is off the table. Not permanently, mind you, but for the time being.”
“What does the ‘time being’ mean, Marcus?”
“I’m not sure, Cheryl. Listen, I’m really sorry about this. I know you’ve been coping with a lot and considering your next moves. Please, just don’t do anything rash.”
“Rash!” Cheryl thought, laughter burbling in her throat. She’d been anything but rash. An idea seized her and she narrowed her eyes on her boss. “Marcus, are you sure this doesn’t have to do with my repeated requests for part-time work or telecommuting?”
“No, of course it doesn’t. I know Derek thinks highly of you, and I’m sure it’s just a matter of time. We value you too much to lose you.”
Cheryl frowned. She needed to make a decision. Now.
HBR Case Commentary
Four commentators offer expert advice
Cheryl Jamis’s frustration is understandable. She’s running up against the reality of the “second shift” issue identified by Arlie Russell Hochschild. Women still tend to shoulder the majority of second-shift domestic pressures. Combine these with glass ceiling issues—broken career promises, entrenched stereotypes, and roadblocks to the top—and many female managers reach a tipping point. They start to consider just how high a price they are paying for their ambitions. In their annoyance, they often just quit.
That said, Cheryl is abysmally unprepared for a spontaneous discussion with Marcus Addison. Instead of thinking strategically, she’s being a victim and expecting her boss and her company to solve her problems for her. This is at best naive and at worst dangerous, for it makes Marcus wonder if she’s really as competent as she appears.
Unfortunately, taking what I call a “step out,” or what Sylvia Ann Hewlett calls a career “off-ramp,” would be a big mistake for Cheryl. Ten years from now, when Emma is off to college, Cheryl would find it very difficult, if not impossible, to regain her career traction. As Hewlett noted in her March 2005 HBR article, only 40% of women who leave their careers are able to return to full-time, professional jobs. And if Cheryl thinks the solution is to start her own business, she should remember that almost half of all new businesses fail within the first year.
Assuming Cheryl decides to stay on the job, she must handle her conflicting priorities in a way that works both for her and her company. If Cheryl is to be promoted, she must reject the ridiculous premise that “It’s so hard to say no.” After all, she’s already saying no to her promise to herself about Emma. It’s time for her to stand up for herself and solve this problem with the same kind of energy and optimism she would bring to any corporate roadblock.
Cheryl should take a few days off and get a clear-eyed look at the situation. As a start, she should try to see things from her boss’s perspective. Marcus may be caring and sympathetic, but his focus is on what’s best for the business, not what’s best for Emma. He has the support of a wife at home; he can’t be expected to fully understand Cheryl’s situation or make decisions for her. His job, as Cheryl’s boss, is to see that she manages her team and contributes to the bottom line, period.
When she returns to work, Cheryl should present Marcus with a firm business case for flexible hours. After reminding Marcus that she is a skilled, ambitious, competent, and proven executive who happens to also be a mom, she should set the terms of the contract. For example, she should say that she will leave early a few days a week and telecommute on Fridays. She should concede that what she is asking for is different from the norm but that there’s no reason not to try. She should suggest keeping to the flexible schedule for a set period of time—say, until her next performance review—and then reevaluate it.
She also needs to give Marcus some confidence that the risk will pay off. She should present possible benefits for Marcus to consider and hammer out specific goals and milestones that she will commit to reaching. Given her good relationship with Marcus and her value to the company, the odds are that she will get what she’s asking for.
The onus will then be on Cheryl to meet—or, better yet, exceed—her goals. By doing so, she will have convinced Marcus, HR, and the CEO that she is worthy of the promotion. She will also have shown management that it’s possible for executives to run Copro and have healthy and whole personal lives. And she will prove that women like her are vital to the success of the business.
A powerful woman once told me that a smart, ambitious woman of childbearing age has three choices. Choice number one is to forgo motherhood, follow her dream, and attain a lofty position; in so doing, she will always wonder what life would have been like had she had children. Choice number two is to skip a career, become a mother, and always wonder what she might have attained in the business world. Choice number three is to do a half-baked job of both.
I think there’s a fourth choice, one to which Cheryl has only given passing thought. If Copro can’t give her what she wants, then she can start her own firm.
I was pregnant with my first child when I started my company back in 1982. I was also pregnant with the idea of wanting to run a successful maternity wear business. I’d certainly heard the dire statistics about start-up failures, but I also knew that running my own show was the only way to both feel wholly satisfied in my work and achieve the flexibility I craved.
Cheryl has conflicting desires. She wants to be a top manager, but, even more, she wants to spend time with her daughter. Self-employment is her ticket. Because she is goal driven and disciplined, she also meets two of the most critical criteria for entrepreneurial success. Assuming that she and her husband are willing to take a cut in her income, she can put her self-discipline to work growing her own business. She can calibrate her success over time by working on a project-by-project basis—possibly for Copro, which will undoubtedly be glad to retain her as a contractor—while Emma is young. Later on, when Emma is at university, she can up the ante, devote more time and energy to her clients, and really grow her firm.
Cheryl also needs to understand that flexible hours don’t necessarily mean fewer hours. If she wants her business to thrive, she should be prepared to burn the midnight oil and possibly work harder than she’s doing now. Starting her business will take time, and as it grows, so will the demands. She still won’t make every school play, and she will have far less time for herself.
Whether or not she decides to strike out on her own, I’d advise Cheryl to build more layers of support into her life. In addition to the au pair, she should make sure that someone (whether a relative or a backup babysitter) can help with child care at a moment’s notice if Frauke is unavailable.
If Cheryl chooses to work for herself, then it’s particularly crucial for her to have the full support of her husband, John. It sounds as if John has left domestic operations to Cheryl while he goes about pursuing his own career. He will have to be willing to eat more takeout dinners. He will have to be understanding when Cheryl dedicates some of her nights and weekends to her business instead of to him. But, most important, he will need to be Cheryl’s source of encouragement when her business goes through its ups and downs. If he’s willing to do these things, terrific. If not, then she should not consider starting her own business.
Finally, Cheryl should understand that if she does leave Copro to be an entrepreneur, there’s no looking back. It’s very unlikely that she will be able to get a strong foothold inside a corporation again. And once she injects her money, energy, and pride into starting and running her own business, she’ll have to go for broke. The wins and losses will be hers alone, and her life will be a roller-coaster ride. But if her business does take off, she will feel more pride and satisfaction in her work than she could ever have imagined possible within the walls of Copro.
Senior-level management positions are, by their very nature, intensive, demanding, and full-time. Frankly, Cheryl isn’t yet displaying the most important qualities needed in a senior manager: decisiveness, a knack for proactively identifying and solving problems, an ability to prioritize, and courage. While Marcus has empathy for Cheryl’s situation, her actions are inconsistent with what it takes to be a senior manager at a global company such as Copro. It is one thing to work out a flextime position with Cheryl at her present level of responsibility; it is quite another to seriously consider her as a candidate for senior management. These are two different playing fields, and only Cheryl can decide which one she wants to be on.
It bothers me that Cheryl doesn’t frame her request in an assertive, confident way or offer Marcus a well thought-out, detailed plan explaining how her flextime schedule will work and how it will benefit the company. She’s already had a year to come up with an alternative schedule and show Marcus that she could make it work, but instead of demonstrating confidence, she waffles and fumbles.
Cheryl also seems to lack a sense of clear priorities. A capable executive with children can always figure out ways to work an important personal event such as a school play into his or her schedule. And by failing to look Marcus in the eye and say, “I’m sorry, but I have another commitment” when he offers her the Boulder assignment, she is displaying a lack of courage.
Initially, Marcus handles the situation well and deserves credit for being a good manager; in fact, he’s everything a mentor should be. He properly sees Cheryl as an investment, coaches her, and gives her all kinds of opportunities to win. He recognizes Cheryl’s skills and makes it clear that he wants her to accomplish her personal goals. He even lets her showcase her talents in front of the CEO.
Marcus needs to have a heart-to-heart talk with Cheryl. He can remind her how valuable she is to the company and say he is willing to support her campaign for flextime if it can be a win-win strategy. At the same time, he should candidly tell her that he’s troubled by her indecisiveness and lack of strategic thinking. Copro can certainly work out a halfway bargain, but he should insist that she demonstrate her value by taking full responsibility for figuring out her situation.
Assuming that Cheryl can come back with a workable plan, she and Marcus should move forward and see how it goes. Cheryl has earned the opportunity to prove she can handle the assignment with less-demanding time constraints. When she feels ready, she can come back full-time. At that point, provided she begins to show better leadership, they can choose to reevaluate her options.
Should she decide that she wants a higher position, Cheryl will need to prove that she can do everything demanded of an executive. Marcus will need to continue to coach her along, encouraging her to take responsibility and demonstrate courage, and to meet with the executive coach recommended by HR. Perhaps he could also pair her with another senior manager who has successfully navigated a similar career crossroad.
Sometimes, selling your boss on what you want is a matter of framing. Cheryl’s formal, written plan should detail how she will overcome the problems—both real and perceived—that a flextime schedule can present. Its overarching theme? “How My Plan Will Better Serve Copro.” Finally, she and Marcus should work together to establish clear parameters for what will constitute success. That way, both of them will know whether Cheryl’s new schedule is allowing her to meet company goals—or whether it’s time for her to move on.
Cheryl is very fortunate. She has a good job with a good company, a supportive boss, and a CEO who thinks highly of her. Her biggest issue is not with her company but with her daughter.
Cheryl needs to stop feeling guilty about Emma and start helping her daughter understand that the world of adult work is the world of reality. Cheryl is clearly a well-educated achiever who really enjoys the satisfaction of being in harness and thrives on making her goals. She’s earned a place in the professional world. She should be proud of this. It’s nothing to apologize for to anyone—certainly not to her daughter. In fact, her open display of ambivalence could be sending Emma all the wrong messages.
Certainly, Cheryl’s conundrum is understandable. She’s worked her whole life to get where she is. At the same time, she loves her daughter and regrets the time that she can’t spend with her. As is still unfortunately the case in most working families, Cheryl shoulders more of the child care burden. Most companies have not evolved to the point where they can help their most talented women deal with the very visceral, difficult tension of trying to balance work and family.
I navigated this tension by going to work part-time and putting my ambitions temporarily on hold. When I came to Egon Zehnder in 1991, I had two children—one a year-old baby. At the time, there weren’t many women in the higher echelons, and they were thrilled to have me as a consultant. Like Cheryl, I asked to work part-time because I needed to care for my children, and the firm accommodated my wishes. But there was no such thing as a part-time partner.
The chairman and the CEO, as well as my office leader, wanted very much to help me, but the firm’s culture required that those in top positions be fully committed. We made a deal: If I came to work full-time, I would be made partner. I continued to work part-time on important projects, including founding the largest women’s professional network in France, which helped me stay in touch, build my own network, and keep my skills sharp. I came back to work full-time to be able to become a partner after the birth of my third daughter, coincidentally named Emma.
My experience taught me that while women should never feel guilty about asking for what they want, it’s naive to think that employers can or should bend the rules for them. More and more companies are building flextime into their working arrangements, and this is to be commended; at the same time, global firms require that their senior women be able to travel, to work in different time zones, and to do what it takes to make the firm successful. Women can bring their own style to work, but the commitment of time and energy remains the same for every senior person, regardless of gender.
Equally important for corporate evolution are two questions almost never asked: “What is a good father?” and “How is it possible to be a good father and a topflight executive as well?” I find it fascinating that while 76% of male CEOs have a nonworking spouse, only 27% of female CEOs do.
Assuming Cheryl wants to keep her job and get promoted, she should stop feeling guilty about Emma and start managing her daughter’s expectations better. Difficult as it may be to be separate from her daughter now, Cheryl should take consolation from the thought that, though she cannot “have it all” at the same time, she can “have it all in the end.” When she’s older, Emma will understand that being a good role model is a big part of being a good mother.
Sharman Esarey (sharman_esarey@yahoo.com) is the Vienna-based editor of a handbook on criminal justice for the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime. Arno Haslberger (arno_haslberger@yahoo.com) teaches human resource management at Webster University Vienna in Austria and at Ashridge Business School in London.
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